As some of you are aware I've not actually been active in the Highlander fandom for that long. I think its about a year a bit now. I'm still very much a newbie really. As such I'd like to relate one of my 'newbie' experiences to you all.
When I took that first swandive into the Highlander fandom I did the usual thing of going to Y!Groups and joining as many HL slash lists as possible. Obviously one of these lists was ODM (OnlyDuncanMethos), which is run by![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
lastrega and the other was SDM (StrictlyDuncanMethos) which is, or was, run by mslasha.
Upon receiving the FAQ for SDM I was somewhat startled by the fact that one of the rules was that there was to be no mention of the writing of or discussion of the person known astritorella on list. There was also a selection of her other aliases given just to avoid any confusion. At this point, I hasten to add, I didn't *know* Trit. I had seen some of her posts on other lists and read some of her fic but I'd no actual personal experience with her.
This seemed a little *odd* as a rule for a lists so I actually took the step of emailing the mods/owner and asking what on earth this was all about. One of the mods replied as didmslasha personally with a lengthy explanation of their grievances and also a link to webpage (now removed) which had excerpts of emails from Trit amongst other people and purported to be examples of trollish behaviour. Now this disturbed me.
Firstly, I was very uncomfortable with the fact that someone was posting emails on a webpage like this. Secondly, I admit quite freely that I assumed that there is no smoke without fire and that Trit must be a fairly difficult person and done something fairly bad to warrant this sort of treatment. So, I made some comment about how shocked I was, I even offered my services in a legal capacity should the owner or mods of SDM suffer any similar problems in the future and then I went my own sweet way and forgot all about it.
Okay, lets fast forward a month or so. I'm now easing my way into the fandom and big tart that I am, I manage to attract the attention of various lovely people who invite me to join some private HL related lists. One of these people is my darlinglastrega who invited me to join a private list she modded. It turns out this list was actually owned by Trit. I thought nothing of it really as I had no actual beef with Trit and liked her stories.
Move forward another month or so. I get involved in writing a Round Robin with various members of Trit's list includinglastrega, tritorella herself , litalex, dkwilliams and darthhellokitty. This eventually evolves into Comes A Scotsman and is posted on various lists.
Imagine my surprise to then receive an email from one of the mods of SDM which asked me if I was indeed a member of Trit's private list. I replied saying "Yes" and asking, "why she wanted to know this?" I then got back a decidedly snippy email accusing me, amongst other things, of being a spy for Trit on SDM and associating with people known to be sympathisers with her. As you can probably imagine my response to that was somewhat less then civil. It's also worth mentioning at this point that at no time on Trit's list hadmslasha or any of her friends been mentioned nor the disagreement that existed between them been alluded to. Anyway, I exchanged various mildly irritated emails with the mods and the owner of SDM and I did think that the situation had been resolved as I heard nothing further from any of them.
At the same time I was less then polite on Trit's list. I basically posted something along the lines of, "what the flying fuck is all this crap and why am I getting dragged into it?" *That* was the first time I actually heard the 'other' side of the story from both Trit, herself and fromlastrega. Taking all this on board, I'm afraid my response was pretty much still, "all well and good but frankly I don't *care* what happened or about what someone has or hasn't done and bollocks to the lot of you, leave me out of it!"
Shortly after this, I attempted to access the SDM archive and found I was no longer a member of the list. When I tried to emailmslasha to ask why I had been removed from the list, my email was returned because my email address had apparently been blocked.
So I washed my hands of the whole affair and moved on.
Over time I have got to knowtritorella better. She is without a shadow of a doubt, an acquired taste. She's opinionated, she's blunt and sometimes she is rude. I have on occasion disagreed vehemently with things she has said on lists. This does not however stop me regarding her as an excellent writer, a great contributor to fandom and someone I have the utmost respect, admiration and friendship for. Of late she has kindly volunteered to host my Kink!Fic Challenge on her webpage and also to update it for me, even though she now has left the Highlander fandom.
I can't comment on what has caused all the animosity between Trit andmslasha and her friends. I wasn't around when it happened. I can however make the following observations:
1. Disagreeing with someone, even hating them is understandable. We are not all going to like each other in fandom and sometimes this will involve frayed tempers all round. I am as guilty as anyone of this. Look at the whole J-Blo mess! That said, posting lists of email addresses, IP addresses and various aliases publically on the web, of people you don't like, is *not* acceptable for *any* reason. It's an infringement of personal privacy and doubly so if you cannot even get these correct and implicate people who have nothing to with your little fight.
2. Squealing constantly on lists and in LJ about how badly the person you disagree with has treated you and how they are 'stalking' you, starts to wear slightly thin after the first year or so. Particularly when the person you disagree with hasn't mentioned your argument at all, anywhere.
3. It's a good idea to have clear proof that someone has done you wrong before you start waging a campaign of hate against them across several fandoms. Funnily enough uninvolved third parties might actually consider behaviour like that as stalking and troll-like.
4. Accusing people you don't know of spying for your enemies is pathetic. It may come as a shock to you but many people could not care less about your dispute, nor do they want to hear about it.
mslasha, wickdzoot, houseofsnark, and xander_spike you have brought all this on yourselves by your ridiculous behaviour. I have no sympathy and I certainly shall be regarding any of your future whines about being stalked and harassed with a very large pinch of salt. I see that now, you have deleted most of the controversial comments from your LJ's. I think that says it all.
Everyone involved in this hideous mess should take a deep breath, get some perspective and back away from the argument before things get seriously nasty. I know it's a hard thing to ask for mature behaviour in fandom but you know, I live in hope! I'll leave it up to whoever reads this to make their own minds up about who is telling the truth. If you want to abuse, shout, comment or talk to me about what I said please do. I have simply stated the facts as I see them. Undoubtably I'm going to be accused of bias in favour of Trit because of my interaction with her. I think however the majority of people who read this will realise I have no axe to grind.
There is one thing I would like to add to this. The comment here made bygabixenafen about Trit is a complete and utter lie. I don't care how 'reliable' the so-called source was. I was at HLDU5 with Trit and present for all her interactions (which were few) with the various guests of honour. I can state categorically that this *never* happened! Spreading lies like this is malicious and nasty and says more about the people who make them then anything about Trit. The organisers of HLDU5 would be equally horrified to see that false accusations such as these are being made. I strongly suggest to the owner of this LJ that this comment is removed.
Now, lets *never* speak of this again.
When I took that first swandive into the Highlander fandom I did the usual thing of going to Y!Groups and joining as many HL slash lists as possible. Obviously one of these lists was ODM (OnlyDuncanMethos), which is run by
lastrega and the other was SDM (StrictlyDuncanMethos) which is, or was, run by mslasha.Upon receiving the FAQ for SDM I was somewhat startled by the fact that one of the rules was that there was to be no mention of the writing of or discussion of the person known as
tritorella on list. There was also a selection of her other aliases given just to avoid any confusion. At this point, I hasten to add, I didn't *know* Trit. I had seen some of her posts on other lists and read some of her fic but I'd no actual personal experience with her. This seemed a little *odd* as a rule for a lists so I actually took the step of emailing the mods/owner and asking what on earth this was all about. One of the mods replied as did
mslasha personally with a lengthy explanation of their grievances and also a link to webpage (now removed) which had excerpts of emails from Trit amongst other people and purported to be examples of trollish behaviour. Now this disturbed me.Firstly, I was very uncomfortable with the fact that someone was posting emails on a webpage like this. Secondly, I admit quite freely that I assumed that there is no smoke without fire and that Trit must be a fairly difficult person and done something fairly bad to warrant this sort of treatment. So, I made some comment about how shocked I was, I even offered my services in a legal capacity should the owner or mods of SDM suffer any similar problems in the future and then I went my own sweet way and forgot all about it.
Okay, lets fast forward a month or so. I'm now easing my way into the fandom and big tart that I am, I manage to attract the attention of various lovely people who invite me to join some private HL related lists. One of these people is my darling
lastrega who invited me to join a private list she modded. It turns out this list was actually owned by Trit. I thought nothing of it really as I had no actual beef with Trit and liked her stories. Move forward another month or so. I get involved in writing a Round Robin with various members of Trit's list including
lastrega, tritorella herself , litalex, dkwilliams and darthhellokitty. This eventually evolves into Comes A Scotsman and is posted on various lists.Imagine my surprise to then receive an email from one of the mods of SDM which asked me if I was indeed a member of Trit's private list. I replied saying "Yes" and asking, "why she wanted to know this?" I then got back a decidedly snippy email accusing me, amongst other things, of being a spy for Trit on SDM and associating with people known to be sympathisers with her. As you can probably imagine my response to that was somewhat less then civil. It's also worth mentioning at this point that at no time on Trit's list had
mslasha or any of her friends been mentioned nor the disagreement that existed between them been alluded to. Anyway, I exchanged various mildly irritated emails with the mods and the owner of SDM and I did think that the situation had been resolved as I heard nothing further from any of them.At the same time I was less then polite on Trit's list. I basically posted something along the lines of, "what the flying fuck is all this crap and why am I getting dragged into it?" *That* was the first time I actually heard the 'other' side of the story from both Trit, herself and from
lastrega. Taking all this on board, I'm afraid my response was pretty much still, "all well and good but frankly I don't *care* what happened or about what someone has or hasn't done and bollocks to the lot of you, leave me out of it!"Shortly after this, I attempted to access the SDM archive and found I was no longer a member of the list. When I tried to email
mslasha to ask why I had been removed from the list, my email was returned because my email address had apparently been blocked. So I washed my hands of the whole affair and moved on.
Over time I have got to know
tritorella better. She is without a shadow of a doubt, an acquired taste. She's opinionated, she's blunt and sometimes she is rude. I have on occasion disagreed vehemently with things she has said on lists. This does not however stop me regarding her as an excellent writer, a great contributor to fandom and someone I have the utmost respect, admiration and friendship for. Of late she has kindly volunteered to host my Kink!Fic Challenge on her webpage and also to update it for me, even though she now has left the Highlander fandom.I can't comment on what has caused all the animosity between Trit and
mslasha and her friends. I wasn't around when it happened. I can however make the following observations:1. Disagreeing with someone, even hating them is understandable. We are not all going to like each other in fandom and sometimes this will involve frayed tempers all round. I am as guilty as anyone of this. Look at the whole J-Blo mess! That said, posting lists of email addresses, IP addresses and various aliases publically on the web, of people you don't like, is *not* acceptable for *any* reason. It's an infringement of personal privacy and doubly so if you cannot even get these correct and implicate people who have nothing to with your little fight.
2. Squealing constantly on lists and in LJ about how badly the person you disagree with has treated you and how they are 'stalking' you, starts to wear slightly thin after the first year or so. Particularly when the person you disagree with hasn't mentioned your argument at all, anywhere.
3. It's a good idea to have clear proof that someone has done you wrong before you start waging a campaign of hate against them across several fandoms. Funnily enough uninvolved third parties might actually consider behaviour like that as stalking and troll-like.
4. Accusing people you don't know of spying for your enemies is pathetic. It may come as a shock to you but many people could not care less about your dispute, nor do they want to hear about it.
mslasha, wickdzoot, houseofsnark, and xander_spike you have brought all this on yourselves by your ridiculous behaviour. I have no sympathy and I certainly shall be regarding any of your future whines about being stalked and harassed with a very large pinch of salt. I see that now, you have deleted most of the controversial comments from your LJ's. I think that says it all.Everyone involved in this hideous mess should take a deep breath, get some perspective and back away from the argument before things get seriously nasty. I know it's a hard thing to ask for mature behaviour in fandom but you know, I live in hope! I'll leave it up to whoever reads this to make their own minds up about who is telling the truth. If you want to abuse, shout, comment or talk to me about what I said please do. I have simply stated the facts as I see them. Undoubtably I'm going to be accused of bias in favour of Trit because of my interaction with her. I think however the majority of people who read this will realise I have no axe to grind.
There is one thing I would like to add to this. The comment here made by
gabixenafen about Trit is a complete and utter lie. I don't care how 'reliable' the so-called source was. I was at HLDU5 with Trit and present for all her interactions (which were few) with the various guests of honour. I can state categorically that this *never* happened! Spreading lies like this is malicious and nasty and says more about the people who make them then anything about Trit. The organisers of HLDU5 would be equally horrified to see that false accusations such as these are being made. I strongly suggest to the owner of this LJ that this comment is removed.Now, lets *never* speak of this again.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
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Some points to consider
It is really rather odd that since some of the people involved in spreading these email addresses - or allowing comments listing them to remain in their LJs right up until LJ Abuse forced them to be removed - are involved in providing services to fans and being in commercial relationships with them. One would have thought their reputations for being trustworthy and being able to keep confidential, personal information garnered through such commercial relationshops private, would be immensely important to them - but clearly that matters less than making sure that their friends are provided with whatever ammunition they need to pursue their grudge matches.
On the question of email addresses - just because a fan also contacts you under her real name, using her 'real' email address (with no intention to deceive, and making the connection herself between fannish and real identities), does not give you the right to connect real and fannish information or to claim that such personal information is somehow connected to fandom. For instance, if a fan ran LiveJournal, and I had a problem with my account (or, as I have just done, reported several users for abuse), and I gave my real name and my profesional email (as I did, because this isn't a fannish thing, it's to do with real entities and legal matters) that doesn't give Brad the right to spread my real name and email address all over LiveJournal or any other wesbites he may host. One of the addresses listed in the now thankfully deleted journal belonging to one of these people, was harvested in just this fashion - I wrote to one of the people involved over a commercial matter, and used my real name and professional email because this was a matter of legalities. I may be guilty of stupidity - but what does it make the person who passed that email on to a third party, or the person who passed it onto
Similarly - if any of you have ever written to someone you call a close friend from a work address, or a temporary address pureply on a personal basis, would you expect your 'friend' to call that address a fannish address and think they were justified in spreading it around? If any of you have ever changed pseuds along with a fandom, or used a joint pseud for a co-authored project, would you expect people to claim you were carrying out a deception? And would it *ever* justify publishing someone's real name, private addresses and family email addresses?
So next time you see this list of email addresses passed around (and it is being passed around, I am sure of it), or you access a selective little enclave and are 'initiated' into the great secret that is Tritorella - just remember this. Fans fall out with astonishing regularity. Next time - this could be you.
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GADS I'm sorry...I thought I'd clipped that part...
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Re: GADS I'm sorry...I thought I'd clipped that part...
S'oaky hun, Trit and I know you meant well. Any chance you could re-post?
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Here's the text from SDM FAQ#11...and my comments
"11. Are there any topics that are off-limits?
There is one topic that is off limits and actually it's not a topic, but a person. Due to various reasons (which can be explained off list), one Highlander fan is not allowed on the SDM list and has been permanently banned. Because of her actions in Highlander fandom (and others) she is not welcomed here, nor is any mention of her allowed on the SDM list. And that includes recommendations of her fiction, her web site and her in general. If this is something you don't
agree with, we are sorry, but there are legitimate reasons for this action. Many SDM members of long-standing have specifically asked for this ban and I agree with it. "
My comment was originally that if Jennie indeed is trying to change the tone and content of the SDM list (which remains on Y!groups in *spirit* mostly) this should have been removed from the FAQ. In the FAQ section the only thing that I believe has changed since Holly's resignation (and oh so whiney speech about her departure) is that apparently the majority of the list activities have been moved to a new "/city" location and all members now must go through the "reapplication" process (ie., screening for spies and trolls) in order to continue membership. Interestingly enough, although Jennie does try to assert in the FAQ that Holly has no interest in or is even a member of the new list, she is the list owner because it clearly states that she's paying the bills for the site.
My other comment was that I had only joined SDM for the fiction (some of which was good, some of which was crap) however since then I have become much more aware of who's fiction is worth reading and that when I want someone who's quality is consistently excellent I will turn to Trit's and other's I've found associated here.
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Re: Here's the text from SDM FAQ#11...and my comments
But as you can attest, that paragraph lists my real name. Perhaps you could paste it with the names asterisked out? God forbid you are accused of paraphrasing them. I think it's an interesting illustration of the kind of people we're dealing with.
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Re: Here's the text from SDM FAQ#11...and my comments
I really shouldn't to be surprised by anything that has to do with this business any more. But I am. They used your real name? Don't these people have any limits? And here I was thinking that this was the one unwritten rule of slash communities: keep real names out of it. Obviously, I've been wrong.
All of this is making me quite happy about my decision to have a very limited connection to fandom. I'm undoubtedly missing the chance to meet lots of interesting people, but this ... drama? I can definitely do with out it.
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Re: Here's the text from SDM FAQ#11...and my comments
You might notice that my site and my LJ is not passworded or locked, and *my* list members (several of whom are or were on this SDM thing quite peacefully, without any conflict of interest) aren't required to eschew any topic - in fact, telling someone what they can't talk about on that list is actually the only prohibition we have. Gee, could this be that I don't have anything to be ashamed of or to hide? It could just mean I'm so incredibly evil that I can't help but reveal my evilness. On the other hand, it might mean something altogether.
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Sorry...I deleted not only the text as written...
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Re: Sorry...I deleted not only the text as written...
"So, Tritorella aka Crushergal, HoniSoit, C. ********** (or whatever name she is calling herself these days) is a no-no topic of conversation on the StrictlyDuncanMethos list. Break this rule and you will be unsubbed immediately and banned from SDM for good. So sorry to have to add this rule, but there are valid reasons."
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That's it exactly.
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Re: Here's the text from SDM FAQ#11...and my comments
Memebers to SDM will be screened as obviously one does not wish to have underaged subscribers to a slash list. We welcome genuine contributors to the fandom, and anyone that adheres to the FAQ. Here it is.
~~~~~~~
The StrictlyDuncanMethos Mailing List FAQ
Welcome to the StrictlyDuncanMethos -- or SDM -- mailing list! Thank you for taking the time to read this FAQ. The SDM list was created in February 2002 to be a fiction and discussion list about the TV show, Highlander: the Series and especially to promote the slash relationship of Duncan MacLeod and Methos from the series.
If you don't like slash fiction and you don't like Duncan with only Methos, then really, this list isn't for you! There are other wonderful groups out there that do allow Duncan/Other and Methos/Other stories to be posted, just ask a moderator and they can point you in the right direction. But, the SDM list is what the name states, a Strictly Duncan Methos forum. However, if you love
Duncan/Methos 24/7, then please join us, you've found the right group!
** All new members prior to being approved to SDM list as a member, must send Jennie jennieeMcg@aol.com or Sue <sashworth@shaw.ca> an age statement or you won't be approved. **
So, enough about this list's history,onto the FAQ, which include the list rules and regulations...
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Re: Here's the text from SDM FAQ#11...and my comments
1. What is a FAQ?
For all your newbies out there, a FAQ means Frequently Asked Questions. Meaning if you don't know what the list guidelines are, look at the FAQ, more than likely it will be there -- along with other pertinent information about that individual list. So, if you've just joined a mailing list, it's a good thing to read the FAQ of each particular list you are on, as each list's FAQ's will vary. Most of the time a FAQ will include the premise of the list, rules, regulations and fiction posting guidelines. And that is exactly what the SDM FAQ has in it, so read on.
2. Why is the SDM list by invite-only and why is membership restricted to 105 members?
Well, the SDM isn't really by invite-only. Anyone is allowed to try and join, however, membership can be denied by the moderators. Membership is restricted to 115 members (excluding the list moderators) as the list owners and moderators wanted to keep the SDM list small and informal, meaning they wanted to create an intimate feeling on this list where friends met and greet and talk about their favorite topic -- Duncan and Methos!
3. If membership can be denied, isn't that making the SDM list selective?
No, lots of mailing lists have restricted membership policies. This one is no different. Because of the sensitive nature of our content – ie, slash – we do not want underage subscribers to be exposed to our content. Therefore we have to make our best effort to keep the membership adult.
4. So then, who are the moderators?
The original list owner on Yahoo Groups was Holly Lynn (MethosChickee@aol.com), but she has decided to bow out of Highlander fandom for various reasons and turned the list over to Jennie (JennieeMcG@aol.com). But because of real life commitments, Jennie has a moderator, Sue (sashworth@shaw.ca) to help her with administrative things. Holly is no longer involved and has not been for some time.
Either of us can be contacted by list members if you have any questions or concerns. All moderators have the power to approve/disapprove pending memberships and pending posts.
5. So then, the list is set to moderating each post that is sent to SDM?
No, all of us moderators are way to busy to approve every single e-mail that is posted to SDM, but new members are moderated for the first month. Then, that feature is turned off after the month is up.
6. What is a troll?
A troll is someone who joins a mailing list with the specific intent to start a flame war or cause trouble on the list. Frequently they join under false names and e-mail address and like to cause trouble on lists just for the sheer fun of it, and then unsub after the fur gets flying between members!
Trolls will not be tolerated on SDM list. If you want to cause trouble, please go somewhere else. Anyone thought to be a troll will be warned first to please stop that behavior. If they continue, they will be suspended from SDM for a period, their posts moderated indefinitely and if they continue to act up, they will be banned for life.
7. What are the list rules about flames?
They will not be tolerated. And be sure, the moderators are well aware of what flames are. A flame is not constructive criticism. A flame is, "You suck as a writer, do the world a favor and stop writing!" or "Nobody on this list likes your stuff, post it elsewhere or better yet, stop writing as you cannot string two sentences together!" That is a flame to a writer.
Constructive criticism is more like, "I think your characterization of Methos on page 3 of your story, Duncan and Methos Go Camping was a little off base. Since when is Methos afraid of snakes? Is that in canon? I think maybe you need to reconsider his motives for his acting like a girl and screaming when he saw that snake! Perhaps you would consider rewriting that scene?"
1. What is a FAQ?
For all your newbies out there, a FAQ means Frequently Asked Questions. Meaning if you don't know what the list guidelines are, look at the FAQ, more than likely it will be there -- along with other pertinent information about that individual list. So, if you've just joined a mailing list, it's a good thing to read the FAQ of each particular list you are on, as each list's FAQ's will vary. Most of the time a FAQ will include the premise of the list, rules, regulations and fiction posting guidelines. And that is exactly what the SDM FAQ has in it, so read on.
2. Why is the SDM list by invite-only and why is membership restricted to 105 members?
Well, the SDM isn't really by invite-only. Anyone is allowed to try and join, however, membership can be denied by the moderators. Membership is restricted to 115 members (excluding the list moderators) as the list owners and moderators wanted to keep the SDM list small and informal, meaning they wanted to create an intimate feeling on this list where friends met and greet and talk about their favorite topic -- Duncan and Methos!
3. If membership can be denied, isn't that making the SDM list selective?
No, lots of mailing lists have restricted membership policies. This one is no different. Because of the sensitive nature of our content – ie, slash – we do not want underage subscribers to be exposed to our content. Therefore we have to make our best effort to keep the membership adult.
4. So then, who are the moderators?
The original list owner on Yahoo Groups was Holly Lynn (MethosChickee@aol.com), but she has decided to bow out of Highlander fandom for various reasons and turned the list over to Jennie (JennieeMcG@aol.com). But because of real life commitments, Jennie has a moderator, Sue (sashworth@shaw.ca) to help her with administrative things. Holly is no longer involved and has not been for some time.
Either of us can be contacted by list members if you have any questions or concerns. All moderators have the power to approve/disapprove pending memberships and pending posts.
5. So then, the list is set to moderating each post that is sent to SDM?
No, all of us moderators are way to busy to approve every single e-mail that is posted to SDM, but new members are moderated for the first month. Then, that feature is turned off after the month is up.
6. What is a troll?
A troll is someone who joins a mailing list with the specific intent to start a flame war or cause trouble on the list. Frequently they join under false names and e-mail address and like to cause trouble on lists just for the sheer fun of it, and then unsub after the fur gets flying between members!
Trolls will not be tolerated on SDM list. If you want to cause trouble, please go somewhere else. Anyone thought to be a troll will be warned first to please stop that behavior. If they continue, they will be suspended from SDM for a period, their posts moderated indefinitely and if they continue to act up, they will be banned for life.
7. What are the list rules about flames?
They will not be tolerated. And be sure, the moderators are well aware of what flames are. A flame is not constructive criticism. A flame is, "You suck as a writer, do the world a favor and stop writing!" or "Nobody on this list likes your stuff, post it elsewhere or better yet, stop writing as you cannot string two sentences together!" That is a flame to a writer.
Constructive criticism is more like, "I think your characterization of Methos on page 3 of your story, Duncan and Methos Go Camping was a little off base. Since when is Methos afraid of snakes? Is that in canon? I think maybe you need to reconsider his motives for his acting like a girl and screaming when he saw that snake! Perhaps you would consider rewriting that scene?"
<Sidenote: Constructive criticism is something like that! ? Ask a moderator first if you are unsure. >
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Re: Here's the text from SDM FAQ#11...and my comments
Contact a moderator, contact a moderator! Make this your mantra -- flaming that person back on list will not be accepted no matter how much they may have sullied your reputation. It may make you feel better at that precise moment, but it is not good for the list. People who openly flame each other on SDM will be given a warning in private to cease and desist. If the moderators feel that discussion thread is causing problems, a note will be posted to SDM for that thread to stop being discussed. Meaning end of discussion. Period, do not cross Go, do not collect $200.
If the perpetrators ignore that administrative order, then people will be suspended for one week. If they come back to the list and continue to flame people, they will be banned. So, it's warning, suspension, banning. Once you are banned from SDM, you cannot be invited back on.
However, if after the week's suspension, you come back to the list and play nice, we forget about the incident and start all over again. Meaning if you act up again, first you get a warning, then a suspension, then are banned. Believe me, you have to basically threaten to kill someone to be banned off this list!
9. What if a SDM list member flames me off list?
Well, really, there is nothing I can do. It is not our job to 'police' SDM list member's attitudes or behaviors. We are all adults here.
I say follow the golden rule, 'treat your neighbor as yourself' -- meaning play nice with others and they will play nice with you!
However, we know that flames are very hurtful and some people enjoy sending them just to torment others. So, here is some advice: ignore flames! Delete flames, don't respond (even if you are itching to), and put that person in your kill-file (meaning ban them from sending your e-mails.) It may not be the most satisfying solution, but believe me, it is the best!
If for some reason, you have taken the high road, done all these suggestions and this person continues to harass you, what do you do? File a compliant with that other person's ISP (Internet Service Provider). It is your right. Will the SDM moderators throw them off the list in this case? Not necessarily. We will look at both sides of the story and see what solution can be reached. However, SDM moderators are not here to be mediators in personal disputes. We don't want that job, so please limit this option to very rare circumstances.
10. Can I post a private e-mail message from someone to the SDM list?
Don’t unless you can prove you have permission. If it is done without permission, you will be moderated. If you persist, you will be unsubscribed.
11. So, the SDM list only allows Duncan MacLeod/Methos slash fiction to be posted?
Yes, that's what the name says and that's what you get! As stated before, there are other wonderful Highlander lists out there for fiction that feature a pairing of: Methos/Other, Duncan/Other, Methos/Joe, Methos/Duncan/Amanda, Methos/Richie, Methos/Kronos, and Duncan/Kronos ...well, I think you get the picture. This list was created because a need was felt that there be one mailing list that was very specific in its intent and that intent is that we love Duncan/Methos fiction and discussion -- and that pairing solely. We accept no other substitute, so if you want to read some good DM/M stuff, you've come to the right place!
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Re: Here's the text from SDM FAQ#11...and my comments
Then, it is not for posting on this list. Post a URL if you like (with warnings) for your story on SDM, but do not post it to SDM list.
13. What about a story that features Duncan/Methos together and a flash back to Tessa and their life together?
That is fine. As stated in the description on Yahoo!Groups when you joined this list, the fiction here has to consist mainly of a Duncan/Methos pairing in it. If you have a question about this rule, please ask a moderator to read your story first prior to posting it to avoid a problem.
14. What happens if I post a Duncan/Other story that turns into a Duncan/Methos story and the members feel after reading it the majority of the story was the D/O aspect and not a DM/M story?
Well, if you've read the FAQ, hopefully, you won't do that. But if you do, you will be sent an e-mail off list and asked to reread the FAQ so it won't happen again. Do it again and the moderators will not consider it an accident and you will be asked to either submit your stories prior to them being posted or to leave SDM. We are not trying to limit any writers' creativity here, we just have a very specific goal in mind with this list and that's to promote exceptional
Duncan/Methos fiction!
We have offered other options if you feel your story doesn't fit the parameters of this list (see above), in order to try and make a lot of people on SDM happy. Most people who joined SDM are on other Highlander mailing lists, but joined SDM to get their DM/M fix and just that pairing, so we are trying to honor that by creating these rules.
15. How should I label my fiction posts?
All fiction should be labeled in the subject line of your e-mail. It should look something like this:
FIC: "Duncan and Methos Go Camping" 1/2 NC-17 DM/M & DM/Tessa
The subject should say FIC (as some people only read the fiction on this list) and have the title of the story, plus a rating (G, PG, PG-13, R, or NC-17) and the pairing. Most of the time, it will be DM/M; but if you have a flashback Tessa scene, please add that pairing to the subject line in case people who choose not to read other pairing stories and just want to delete it.
16. Are 0 posts required? Meaning an e-mail that has a subject line like this:
FIC: "Duncan and Methos Get Wild on Brazil" R DM/M 0/22
No, but they are recommended. A 0 post would look like this in the body of your e-mail and introduces your story to the list:
Title: Duncan and Methos Go Camping
Author: Writer X
Pairing: Duncan/Methos, Duncan/Tessa (flashback)
Rating: NC-17
Archive: Yes, but only at SDM. (Or no if you don't want it archived).
URL: Place to put your web page, if you like.
Notes/Summary: Describe the story here if you like, this is optional.
Warnings: I only ask for warnings if the story has rape or death (of Duncan/Methos) in it. Some people don't read this type of story and get very upset if they are "surprised" by one. So, for the sake of these people, put a warning in it. Thank you.
17. What if I don't want to put a warning on it, as I like my reader not to know what is going to happen in my story?
If it has a rape or death of Methos or Duncan in it, it must have a warning on it for the SDM list. There are no exceptions to this rule. Sorry. Any other type of warnings are not necessary unless the author feels like they should add something. If you do not like warnings or zero posts on your fiction, again, you might want to consider just posting a URL to this story on SDM.
I hope that this FAQ has answered your questions. If not, contact Sue or Jennie This list was created as a safe, warm environment for Highlander fans to come and discuss, post or read about Duncan MacLeod of the Clan MacLeod with Methos, I hope after joining us you agree. So, come on in, put your feet up, sit back and relax, but most of all -- enjoy!
With kindest regards -- your SDM-L Moderators
~~~~~~~
Once again, thanks for this timely reminder that we should clean house.
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Re: Here's the text from SDM FAQ#11...and my comments
I've reported your SDM group on Yahoo for harassment because of the contents of your original FAQ which is a clear violation of my privacy. I suggest you reword or delete that pile of shit that your 'former' owner wrote, if you don't want to have action taken against you by Yahoo Groups. How any civilised person can stomach seeing that kind of thing done by a fan against another fan, and not protest, I don't know, and I never will understand. Let's hope that there is no repetition of this crap.
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Re: Here's the text from SDM FAQ#11...and my comments
I hope that this will reassure you.
S
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Re: Here's the text from SDM FAQ#11...and my comments
From:
Re: Here's the text from SDM FAQ#11...and my comments
There is only the yahoo list as far as I know, and the /City list closed some time ago,as did the archive, when Holly relinquished ownership.
I am a new member/moderator, and I have changed the FAQ in response to comments. With respect, I would like to have the list leave behind any concerns that it may once have had, and begin to concentrate on its purpose, which is to get Duncan/Methos discussion/fiction etc. underway.
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Thank You
...For taking the time to come here and explain this and also indicate that you have changed the FAQ. Obviously I cannot actually verify this as a non member but I shall take your word for it.
I hope this subject never rears its ugly head again. I'm sure that would make a lot of people in fandom as well as Trit very happy.
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Re: Here's the text from SDM FAQ#11...and my comments
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Re: GADS I'm sorry...I thought I'd clipped that part...
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You know I had no idea until this all came to light...
Unfortunately that very thought now has that Billy Joel tune that PW was singing at Walkabout bouncing around between my ears! And I wasn't even there to be infected with it in person!